Is there something wrong with me?

 Christmas, the way most folks do it, really isn't my thing.

I'm not exactly a scrooge, I enjoy gift giving and I enjoy time off work and a wee little time to see family and friends.

I hate decorating, I hate pulling out the tree and trying to find a place for it, I hate the sense that it is MORE crowded in here than ever before. *4 people and Giant Schnauzer make it full!*
I hate taking everything off and putting it back away and cleaning up all the shit.
I hate the frowns I get when I tell people that Christmas isn't anything extraordinary.

I don't decorate a month or more, early for Halloween (though I do make costumes for my hooligans and we do participate on our own scale) or Easter (I don't decorate at all!), I don't put up lights and sing songs for weeks prior to birthdays and I don't feel badly.

Why do I feel badly about not going all out in preparation for Christmas?
The explanation makes me gag...because of societal pressure!!!!!! *hurl*

I said it.  I, who fights hard against societal pressure in every other aspect of my life, succumbs to it over this little holiday.

How very sad is that?

Perhaps the fact that I have kids and I am extremely prone to feeling guilty about my kids, contributes to the difficulty I have at this time of year.
There is the expectation that the kids will be all lit up with the excitement of Christmas, there is the added expectations of parental participation in the "lighting" of the kids.

It is such a dilemma for me that I have tried to examine whether or not it was a value judgment or just a preference for the lazier life.

I've concluded that frankly, I have a lack of  enthusiasm for Christmas.
I don't buy into the hype and I don't find enjoyment in the decorating or the over the top preparation for it.
 So, I do what is meaningful to me and do not do what is not meaningful to me, just like I do with every other part of life, and parenting and co-existing.

Why was that so hard?

My children are not being deprived by my approach to the holiday.  They are being taught that hand made gifts are meaningful based on the time. energy and thought that was put in to making them.  They are seeing that a heartfelt creation is an extension of  the love and regard we have for the people we create for.  They are NOT learning to race around crowded stores to buy, buy, buy, buy up, buy bigger, buy faster.  They are not seeing the stress (time wise or financial wise) of the "traditional" method of christmasing.
This is NOT a bad thing.
In conclusion, my version of celebrating winter Solstice/Yule/Christmas/Kwanzaa/Hanukkah  is completely valid. We do what we do and how we do it purposefully, intentionally to teach and model what living well is.