His brave and tough wife is carrying on for him, putting two feet on the ground each morning and seeing each day through, even though many days, she'd like there to be a hole to swallow her pain up in. Somewhere to disappear.
Happy Birthday, Andrew. I didn't know you for long, but you and your family have been tightly entwined in my heart and life. You are a huge part of the man my husband is today and I am thankful for the beauty in the person you chose to be everyday.
I read a blog called "Dad gone mad" http://www.dadgonemad.com/2009/06/bruce.html . About a man who encountered major depressive illness and had to come to terms with being a father, being mentally ill, and still finding a way to consider himself a man...inspite of stereotypes and stigma.
Here is a really moving exerpt from one of his posts.
Bruce’s cancer (non-Hodgkin’s lymphoma) was “aggressive.” Terminal certainly. And soon.
They gave him six months to live
Bruce and his wife had a daughter, my niece: an adorable little redhead with a big smile. I wonder what it must have been like for him to be the father of such a precious child and hear from a physician that he only had six months left to be her daddy.
It’s not fair when a man puts so much of himself into his child and then, just as that child is coming into his own, is taken.
He lived for 10 years.
- - -
I smile when I think of Bruce. I think of how proud he would be of his daughter, who has graduated from college and set out on a career. She comes to visit us now and again, and my children absolutely cannot leave her alone. She’s so loving with them, so patient. Bruce is alive in her spirit.
But my smile is also for what Bruce gave me.
Many of us spend our lives trying to live up to expectations set by others, as though our course has been preordained. We sometimes resign ourselves to the belief that we are at the whim of fate – that someone or something greater than us is in control. That certainly was true of me. But Bruce broke me of that mindset.
He taught me how to fight. His life says to me now that the will to fight and the determination to win are as much a determinant of our success as they are a reflection of our character.
No comments:
Post a Comment
quack back!